Promises Made, Prices Up: The Tale of Trump’s Tariff Fantasy and GOP Tax Nonsense

Imagine a government that promises to lighten your tax burden and stick it to foreign nations, only to deliver policies that fatten the pockets of the wealthy while leaving you with higher grocery bills. Welcome to the Republican economic circus, starring Donald Trump’s latest brainchild: the “External Revenue Service” (ERS). And, not to be outdone, House Republicans are campaigning to abolish the IRS entirely, replacing it with a tax system that would leave billionaires grinning and middle-class Americans clutching their wallets. Let’s dive into the absurdity.

Trump’s External Revenue Service — A Tariff by Any Other Name

Donald Trump’s “External Revenue Service” is as misleading as its name. Billed as a patriotic crusade to make foreign governments “pay their fair share,” the ERS would collect tariffs on imported goods. But here’s the catch: tariffs aren’t paid by foreign governments — they’re taxes on American importers, which are ultimately passed down to consumers.

In Trump’s world, calling tariffs “external revenue” is a clever trick — like calling a pickpocket a “wallet relocator.” It obscures the reality that tariffs drive up prices for everyday Americans. Far from a masterstroke of fiscal ingenuity, the ERS is taxation by deception, dressed in red, white, and blue.

Consider this: under Trump’s previous tariff spree, the average American family paid an additional $1,200 annually on goods from clothing to electronics. That’s a month’s rent or a semester’s worth of college textbooks. Now, Trump wants to double down with a plan that’s more a marketing gimmick than economic policy. Promises made, prices up — that’s the real motto of Trump’s monetary policy.

House Republicans’ IRS Abolition Fantasy

To avoid being outshone by Trump, House Republicans have proposed abolishing the IRS and rewriting the tax code. Their pitch? Simplify taxes and cut government waste. The reality? Create chaos and shift tax burdens onto the middle class.

Eliminating the IRS wouldn’t mean the end of taxes — just the end of efficient enforcement. Without a centralized agency to collect revenue, the government would either need to privatize tax collection or create a patchwork of enforcement mechanisms. History offers a cautionary tale: before the IRS, the federal government relied on customs duties and excise taxes, a system rife with corruption and inefficiency. Do we want to return to the days of tax-collecting bounty hunters?

Republicans frame this as a gift to taxpayers, but it’s a Trojan horse. Consider the effects of the Tax Cuts and Jobs Act (TCJA) of 2017: while it initially lowered taxes for many, by 2025, the top 20% of Americans were projected to reap 65% of the benefits, leaving the bottom 80% with just 35%. Worse, by 2027, some middle-class groups could see tax increases as temporary provisions expire. Proposals like these favor the wealthy while burdening working families. It’s Robin Hood in reverse: take from the many to enrich the few.

Media Continues Sane-Washing the Absurd

Perhaps most troubling is how mainstream media often lends credibility to these ideas. Trump’s ERS is covered as though it’s a serious proposal, with little emphasis on the fact that Americans would pay tariffs. Similarly, the GOP’s IRS abolition is treated as a bold reform instead of the fiscal calamity it would create.

Take the media’s coverage of Trump’s 2018 tariffs: headlines focused on the “trade war with China” while burying the lede that U.S. consumers bore the brunt. Or look at recent analyses of the GOP tax plan, which gloss over its regressive nature. This “sane-washing” of absurd policies normalizes nonsense and leaves the public uninformed.

By treating Trump’s antics as serious governance, the media enables a policymaking environment where slogans matter more than substance — that’s how Trump, not Harris, ended up being elected. Unsurprisingly, we’ve reached a point where Republicans confuse soundbites with solutions.

Real-Life Costs: Stories Behind the Numbers

To understand the human impact of these policies, consider the price increases on seafood due to tariffs on Chinese imports or the burden of higher electricity and food costs caused by proposed tariffs on Canadian goods. These real-world examples show how tariffs aren’t just abstract taxes; they’re direct hits to household budgets. And let’s not forget the uneven benefits of the Republican tax policies: while wealthy taxpayers celebrate, middle-class families face rising costs and disappearing deductions. Meanwhile, as billionaires exploit new loopholes, policies like these don’t just hurt “the little guy” — they kneecap entire communities.

The Bottom Line: Promises Made, Prices Up

Trump’s ERS and the GOP’s IRS abolition plan share a common theme: they disguise economic burdens as political wins. Trump’s tariffs would hit consumers while pretending to target foreign governments. Republicans’ tax proposals would benefit the wealthy while leaving the middle class footing the bill. In both cases, the promise of economic reform is a mirage — and the costs are all too real.

In this upside-down world, the fox isn’t just guarding the henhouse — it’s selling eggs back to the hens at a markup. So next time you hear “patriotic” rhetoric about sticking it to foreign nations or simplifying taxes, remember who’s footing the bill. Promises made, prices up — and it’s you who’ll pay.

~Dunneagin~